


not alone anymore

by winterbitch (WinterLadyy)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Black Paladin Shiro (Voltron), Blade of Marmora Shiro, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pining, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Presumed Dead, Psychic Bond, Reunions, Shiro (Voltron)-centric, Soul Bond, protective Black Lion, temporarily
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-04-23 06:10:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14326278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinterLadyy/pseuds/winterbitch
Summary: Suddenly there was a presence in his mind, filling him with warmth and love, forgiveness that Shiro didn't feel like he deserved."Calm. We are one. We will make a change. You forgive me. I forgive you. Waiting."Shiro smiled, almost involuntarily and let out a deep breath. He wasn't alone in the vast, empty space. He had Black, he had the Blade and he was wanted, needed. It wasn't okay, but Shiro was going forward. To finally meet Black.ORWhat if Shiro never came back to Erath and instead went with the Blade because of some complications during his escape? What if the Black Lion awakened earlier and found Shiro, traumatized and lone but fighting, and recognized him as the Black Paladin? What if fought along the Blade of Marmora, while waiting for the right Paladins to come and deepened his bond with Black?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> it's something i've been thinking for a long time. its focued mostly on shiro's bond with the black lion and is a total canon divergence, basically from the start. some sheith thrown in, because i couldn't help myself

It all began the day Ulaz informed him about the old planet that had been populated by Galra's biggest enemy, therefore their potential biggest ally. According to both him and Kolivan, there hadn't been a signal from that planet in around 10 thousand years, and that should've come as a surprise, but Shiro had long ago got used to the space way of measuring time. Still, a signal from a planet that had been practically dead for thousands of years was somewhat surprising and a little suspicious, which caused a great debate among the Blade members.

That was followed by two Earth days of arguing and deciding if it was worth the trouble of leaving their safe location, especially as Ulaz was very much sought after and it wasn't exactly easy to move around with a Galra metal hand, branding Shiro as the Champion. And maybe, if the situation was different, Shiro would agree, that travelling so far to check the signal was a bad idea. But the situation was very particular and he just sighed deeply, that part of his mind that held his most precious bond lighting up.  Black was ready to wake up and Shiro had been waiting for that moment for almost two years. He took a deep breath and spoke with enough power to quieten everyone else.

"She's waiting for me. I have to go."

There was a moment of silence before Ulaz simply nodded and dismissed everyone else, leaving only him, Shiro and Kolivan in the big room.

"Are you sure?" he asked as gently as he could, and Shiro could only shrug helplessly.

It was difficult to explain the pull he felt towards that one point in space, that tiny speck of a planet where stood the other half of his soul, that amazingly giant and powerful Lion, a sentient being inside of thousands metric tons of metal and machinery.  A miracle of science that for some reason chose Shiro as her other half, branded him as /hers/, let him know there was a purpose in his journey.

Shiro wasn't surprised that Ulaz wanted to make sure. Just a few months ago he had been desperate to get home, see his friends, get to safety, warn his world about the danger. It was such a drastic change, for him to be suddenly requesting a trip to the other side of the universe. Yet, how he was supposed to explain the feeling he got whenever Black Lion spoke to him? That feeling of belonging, purpose, that feeling of /home/, that only one person had given him before.

Keith. His best friend, his...everything actually, that he had been forced to leave behind, then to leave again, when he'd decided to stay in space. It had hurt to make that choice, no matter how much he wanted to actually see Black, it still hurt, every breath was like a torture when he thought how Keith was sure he was dead.  Black still tried to console, comfort him, she came in his dreams soothing the hurt, both from the nightmares and memories, but that still wasn't enough.

Sometimes Shiro wanted to be selfish, just steal a ship and find Earth, assure Keith that he was alive, that he hadn't been left alone again, but... What was the logic in going home, when soon there may be no home to go to if they wouldn't do anything? That thought, along with the desire to help people, help to bring peace, kept him in space. He had a Lion waiting for him on the other side of the universe, and Galra's biggest enemy to convince that the Blade of Marmora was actually an ally.

"I'm sure. We have a job to do, Ulaz. The universe is counting on us."

Kolivan and Ulaz nodded and left him alone, probably sensing that Shiro needed some time. He stood up with a sigh and walked towards the viewport, brilliant galaxies shining outside, casting enough light that he didn't need any synthetic one. They rarely got a moment of calm, a moment to breathe, not with missions and people to save, military bases to destroy. Shiro looked down at his uniform, so different from his orange one from the Kerberos mission. Looking back at everything, Shiro felt as if years had passed, decades in Galra's captivity, forced to fight, to /kill/ like a savage, only for entertainment. His metal hand glistened under the faint light and he closed his eyes with another deep sigh. This tool kept him alive when they'd refused to give him any weapons, allowed him to keep fighting, keep going, but the knowledge that they took away a part of his body filled Shiro with disgust and dread.

Maybe it was good that he wouldn't see Keith again. How was he supposed to explain what had happened to him? How was he supposed to explain the blood on his hands, the lives he had taken only to stay alive, the terrible, terrible things he'd done? The Blade understood, they too have done less than noble things to keep going, to stay undetected and fight for freedom. He fit there. Shiro was an alien amongst them, a hybrid of different species made by Druid's hands, but somehow it worked. He had a purpose and in the darkest moments, he tried to remember the innocent lives they've saved, the good things they've done. War was brutal and terrible, enveloping him like tar, pulling him downdowndown, his dreams filled with blood and pain, both his and others'. The look in the eyes of innocent people he'd killed in the Arena, the pained shout Matt let out when he'd slashed him...

Suddenly there was a presence in his mind, filling him with warmth and love, forgiveness that Shiro didn't feel like he deserved.

_Calm. We are one. We will make a change. You forgive me. I forgive you. Waiting._

Shiro smiled, almost involuntarily and let out a deep breath. He wasn't alone in the vast, empty space. He had Black, he had the Blade and he was wanted, needed. It wasn't okay, but Shiro was going forward. To finally meet Black.

 

* * *

  


Actually, it all began the day the Kerberos mission failed and from there, it was a descent into hell. Aliens turned out to be as hostile as bad science fiction novels warned and Shiro was reminded of how Romans were, hundreds of years ago. The Galra though, they were an extremely developed species, who still used slaves and gladiators as their entertainment. That was something Shiro had troubles understanding at first, but as the days passed, it stopped to matter. He had Matt to protect and fights to win, so when they were finally brought to the arena, it was so easy to act like a bloodthirsty madman and be sent first.

The first fight had been brutal. Difficult in a way nothing else had been before because while Shiro was decent with martial arts, nothing could get you ready for fighting for your life against a monster twice your size. But he'd won that fight. And another one and another one, until he gained a reputation, name and a curse of the Druids’ interest. They couldn't gather how a weak human could kill so many of their gladiators, how he could survive in an environment that logically should've killed him.

First, came the surgeries, doing gods know what, changing him and violating, until he didn't feel comfortable in his own skin. Still, Shiro survived kept on fighting, because Keith was waiting for him on Erath and Takashi Shirogane had never broken a promise, especially not one as important as that.  It was a constant struggle, but it was worth it when Keith came to him in dreams, hazy memories of their quiet goodbye, the look in his eyes.

 

_Although Shiro looked composed and excited, inside he was a mess. Uncertainty and fear at war with excitement and awe, though all of that was overshadowed by sadness. Kerberos mission had been his dream for months, even years, as Shiro had always wanted to see the stars up close, be the one to explore them. Yet, he had something tethering him to Earth, one special person that he wanted to have by his side as he broke through Earth's atmosphere. Keith. Their friendship had been hard at first, mostly because ether younger boy acted much like a spooked, angry cat, while inside he had been desperate for attention, for someone to be there and stay. And so, Shiro stayed._

_Then, came the Kerberos mission, his biggest chance and dream, but also something that forced him to leave Keith for a whole year. It had been something that kept Shiro awake for weeks before the mission and finally, on the day of their departure, he was standing on the desert near their shack, a place for them to relax. Keith was standing close, yet so far away, desperately trying to keep a smile on his face even though Shiro could see him breaking on the inside._

_“I'll come back, you know,” he said quietly._

_It was a conversation they both knew, they had countless ones just like that, but this one felt different. Shiro was going again in just a few short hours and there was nothing to be done. And yes, he was excited but the thought of leaving Keith alone on Earth broke his heart._

_“You can't know that,” Keith whispered, the wind carrying his voice over to Shiro._

_The older man sighed and quickly crossed the distance between them, taking the not into his arms. Keith tensed for a moment before melting into Shiro's body, head tucked into his neck. They've been getting physically closer over the months, Keith slowly lowering his walls around Shiro, but the embrace still felt new and fragile._

_“I can promise you, that no matter what happens, I will come back to you.”_

_Shiro was adamant about it. He and Keith had clicked, even if the younger man tried to deny it, their souls just found each other. It was such an easy friendship, the bond between them deeper than should've been possible after such a short time, but Shiro cherished it. He only hoped that it would last the distance._

_“I won't be another person to leave you, Keith. I'll be back.”_

_Keith only nodded into his neck, hands tightening on Shiro's waist, silent and shaken. He felt like the biggest treasure under Shiro's hands and he hated himself a bit, for leaving him like that, even though this was his biggest dream._

_The boy in his arms made everything so much different and Shiro couldn't have predicted how much could one person change, in such a short period of time._

_“You know I'd prefer to have you as my co-pilot,” he muttered finally, settling one of his hands on Keith's lower back. “And next time you'll be just by my side when I go and explore space.”_

_This was another promise Shiro intended to keep, even though he knew it wasn't exactly in his power. Everything could go wrong and they could end up dead, floating in the cold space, but he knew he would do everything in his power to bring his team home safe. Bring himself home, because Keith was waiting for him and that was the single most important thing on Earth for him._

_“I'm holding you up to it and if you won't return, I'll find you, Shiro. I promise,” Keith whispered into his skin and Shiro could only hold him tighter._

_The sentiment was nice, but Shiro was aware that if he wouldn't return, there would be no hope for him. Space was cold and unforgiving and he was under no impressions he would be able to survive with a faulty ship and no materials. Kerberos was a long way from Earth, so any ship sent to save them would arrive way too late. It was something every pilot of a spaceship had to understand and accept. Death was close enough to touch for them, and it was an art to avoid it._

_“I know you will, Keith. But I'll always come back to you, I promise.”_

 

Memories like that kept Shiro going when he was slowly bleeding on the cell floor, so close to death yet stubbornly refusing to give up. Keith kept him fighting, made him become better and better, slowly working his way up, until he mattered. Not him, Takashi Shirogane, but the Champion, Emperor’s best gladiator.

While sitting on the small cot in his new cell, Shiro looked at his hands, bloodied and bruised and he almost wanted to give up. There were many moments like this, when it all seemed like too much like he couldn't keep killing others, that there was too much blood on his hands already. That was when his quiet realization from the Kerberos mission came. It had been only in space, after breaking through Earth's atmosphere when Shiro had realized that he loved Keith. That the reason for caring so much, wanting to come back for him, was simply his feelings.

After that, love kept him alive, even when they took his hand, gave him a metal one back, when they operated on him, doing gods know what. It was Keith's face, his soft eyes and a warm body in Shiro's arms, that kept him fighting, determined to survive. He had a promise to keep.

Then came the Voice and everything changed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> because of the amazing and nice comments, i've decided to write and post more! hope i won't dissapoint  
> enjoy!

At first, Shiro though that he'd finally gone insane, that the Druids finally got to him, made him lose his mind. It was a normal conclusion after hearing a booming voice in his head, - he was sure no one else heard it because the none of the guards reacted - especially as the voice spoke in English. In space, no one talked in any of Earth's languages and Shiro had been forced to slowly learn some dialect of Galra's. It was very different from any languages he knew so hearing English after months of isolation was like a blessing.

The Voice was loud and somehow enveloped Shiro in its pitch, yet the words were awkward and sentences short. It was as if whoever was speaking was only learning how to communicate in such a low way as speaking and that was one of the reasons why he started to doubt it was his mind. Why would his brain try to create something as unique as the Voice when it could just create hallucinations, as it usually did.

Shiro let his back rest against the wall, the cold soothing his bruises and closed his eyes, trying to focus on the Voice. So far, it had only been short sentences that made no sense, telling him to go and find her, whoever she was, repeating the name Zarkon. Only after hearing the name on the arena did he focus on the Voice.

It turned out that Zarkon was actually the Emperor, the one responsible for his slavery, for forcing all these creatures to fight each other. After that, Shiro started to listen more carefully, going as far as staying up late to listen to the short, incomplete sentences. Slowly, he started to get a vague feeling of frustration, as if whoever was speaking was annoyed with not being able to communicate properly, and unconsciously, Shiro sent back affection and understanding.

The frustration stopped like someone cut it and for a moment he was scared he had been left alone, before surprise followed, along with curiosity and pride. Shiro smiled, in his little, dark cell and closed his eyes, focusing on that feeling. It was the first positive emotion he felt since arriving here and he couldn't get enough of it.

_Young one. You react._

He was startled by the direct mention of him and how composed the sentences seemed. It still wasn't perfect, far from it, but Shiro could actually understand what the Voice was saying. He sent back an affirmation, which was followed by both pride and pleasure and after that it was somehow easier.

When he fought, Shiro pushed everything else way, focusing all of his energy on killing his opponent. It was the only way to survive when he was fighting against beings much larger and more deadly than him, though with time, he got better. He started to see how to use his surroundings to his advantage, how to use the alien hand and kill easier.

It wasn't something he was proud of, but those skills kept him alive, and that meant he had more chances of returning to Keith. Shiro didn't dare to dream anymore, not about coming back to Earth, but he needed something to ease the pain of killing others, the disgust of seeing blood on his hands.

The Voice also started to help, coming when he was finished with fighting or being operated on, with warm feelings and quiet apologies and Shiro clutched that like a lifeline. The Voice became his only source of any comfort and they slowly started to talk, though it never tried to talk about destiny or war again. It seemed to understand how hard it was to just survive and so they started to talk if one could call it that. Usually, it was just Shiro recalling his years on Earth, the Garrison and Keith, always Keith, no matter the situation. It was his little comfort after the pain and misery of fights and Shiro used every second.

 

Then, came the dreams.

 

_He was piloting a ship, that much Shiro could tell, but it wasn't anything like any shop he'd ever flown or even seen. The controls lit up in purple, letting his trace every move, every engine, though the language wasn't anything he'd ever seen either. Then, came the stream of alien presence in his mind, and suddenly Shiro could understand everything._

_The ship was weirdly shaped and it had something that worked a bit like wings, Shiro could tell from the screens and the presence in his mind didn't fade away. He was Takashi but he was also Her, Black Lion and oh, it was a Lion he was flying, everything became clear for a moment._

_The space in front of the screen wasn't dark, wasn't alien and unforgiving, it was lit up with thousands of stars, purple and pink and blue, everything he'd ever dreamed of seeing and he wasn't alone anymore. They were one and they were so different but the same, working as one organism._

_It wasn't like anything he'd ever experienced and suddenly the stories his Grandma had told him so long ago made sense, the ones about a being that was the other half of your soul. Shiro felt like that, like they were one and the same while also remaining so different, him a small human and Her a giant, steel Lion with a soul._

_They were flying through space, undisturbed by anyone, silent but comfortable, and Shiro wanted to feel like that forever. The only thing missing was Keith next to him and She understood his sadness. She too was alone, longing for her pride, her family. They were two lonely being, far away from their family, looking for a way to be reunited again. They weren't alone anymore._

 

Shiro gasped for breath, suddenly waking in the small, cold cell and for a moment he felt terribly out of place, vulnerable and alone. Then, She was there again, Black Lion, whether that meant. Shiro understood She was waiting for him somewhere, locked away from others so that they wouldn't get Her. They had this link, this bond and they both cherished it because it was the only thing they had.

He closed his eyes with a deep sigh, his whole body still aching but suddenly alive from his dream. This was what was waiting for him, whatever that meant and Shiro was curious to explore it. He wanted to know what all of that meant, what She was trying to tell him. Glimpses of her memories weren't enough for him to get the full picture, not with how fractured their conversation usually was.

He didn't blame Black for that, not when he could feel her frustration and annoyance. It was clear that She wanted to tell him more, to have a proper conversion, especially as Shiro could feel that they were running out of time. Time for what and when, he didn't know, but the vague feeling was there and that was enough.

That knowledge made him a bit anxious, that restless feeling never leaving him though Shiro knew that it wasn't exactly his feeling. It was all Black, but wherever connection they had allowed it bleed them through. It made him wonder just how deep their bond went and how in the hell did that even form, with him, stuck in Galra's prison and Black somewhere on the other side of the universe.

Everything was more than a little sketchy and Shiro hated not having enough data, because that meant he was kept in the dark, in a situation much greater than his usual life. This whole thing felt big, bigger than even the Kerberos mission, which made Shiro feel even more vulnerable than the arena did.

He just wanted to know what it was all about, why did She choose him, what was so special about some early human, who had been forced to kill and fight for his life. He wasn't special, not compared to many of his opponents or even Galra themselves, with their agile bodies and superior strength.

It had taken Black only one dream to show him why it had to be him.

 

_Shiro wasn't a pilot this time, he wasn't even a human anymore, he was something so much greater, yet not more complex than his normal being. It was kind of confusing because while he wasn't exactly in control of his (their?) actions, he could feel everything, experience everything. It felt a bit as if his little, short being had been stretched to fit Her form, her enormous being and long years. Shiro wasn't exactly uncomfortable, but it was still weird as if it wasn't his place, not his universe of existence._

_Fortunately, Black was back with him, calmness spreading through Shiro's mind, allowing him to relax even though he didn't have a physical body. They were one, a shining galaxy of a being, something impossibly large enclosed in a metal, almost indestructible body. She wasn't just an AI, a sentient being in a machine. She was something so much greater, much more ancient and Shiro was once again hit by awe, that /he/ had been the one chosen to fly with her. He got to experience that amazing feeling of being complete, belonging somewhere, aware that he wasn't the only one._

_Black was firm in showing Shiro just how much his acceptance and willingness to learn meant, though he couldn't understand why. He was just a normal human, a broken and tortured one, killing to stay alive. Shiro felt as if he didn't deserve Her, not even a bit, though once again Black growled at that.  Shiro only smiled, as much as he could, and enjoyed the ride._

_They were soaring through space, everything around them eerie and silent, still in a way Shiro hasn't seen since his Kerberos mission. Suddenly, there was a ripple and in front of them opened a battlefield. Shiro glanced around as much as he could, and aside from Black, there were four other Lions. Red, Blue, Green and Yellow, all of them looking distinctly different._

_They were his Pride, his to protect and lead and Shiro immediately felt protective of them. His bond with Black allowed him to feel Her emotions and it was easy to start looking out for them, just like She did. They were fighting, someone, something, but try as he might, Shiro couldn't see the pilot._

_“Are you protecting me?” he sent to her, knowing she wouldn't withhold such crucial information without a reason._

_His only answer was a low rumble, apologetic but firm and Shiro just sighed. Even after such a short time, he knew it was pointless to try and get Black to tell him something she didn’t want to share. They were equally stubborn and he chuckled. So far, only Keith had been as stubborn as him. The thought of his friend made Black sent a soothing rumble, but Shiro only focused on the moment. There would be time to mourn his friendship and miss Keith. Later._

_The fight was over soon, but Shiro couldn’t help noticing how they didn’t move flawlessly as a team. He knew it couldn’t have been their first, or even one of the first, fights together, but they didn’t fit right for some reason. He tried to tell Black that, but she only sighed sadly. She knew but she couldn’t do anything, not when her Paladin and others treated them as machines, warships. Shiro scoffed at that but stayed silent, observing as they landed in a beautiful Castle._

_Once the Paladins left, and Shiro didn’t even have much time to actually observe them, they were alone. He, Black and Her mysterious Paladin. When he focused, Shiro could sense Her worry and once he dwelled deeper, he saw the source of it. Black Paladin wasn’t the person Shiro had thought them to be, loyal and passionate about protecting others, a born leader, a good one. Instead, he was a mess of darkness and ambition, where Black was only a weapon, a way of accomplishing his own goals. It made Shiro sick and he growled, angry that anyone sitting in the pilot seat could be so stupid and blind to Her greatness._

_“He didn’t deserve you,” he sent to Black, only getting a sad sigh in response.It broke Shiro’s heart a bit because She became a part of him, an important part of him, and now he could see how others treated Her. How Her own Paladin had only seen her as means of getting what he has wanted. And suddenly, Shiro understood what She had been hiding from him. “It was Zarkon.”_

_Shiro didn’t even need to ask, but Black still nodded. It made so much sense, why She would deny him the knowledge. After all, Zarkon was the one responsible for his imprisonment and suffering, for his lost limbs and scars._

 

The dream ended and Shiro gasped for air, suddenly feeling so so alone and small. Then, Black once again was there, quiet and comforting, apologizing for things that hadn’t been her fault.

“It’s okay girl,” he croaked, while carefully sitting up.

His whole body ached, but it wasn’t that surprising, Shiro was slowly getting used to it. With every passing day, it was harder to come back to himself, to remember the good things that were waiting for him on Earth, to remember who he had been before this whole mess. Black helped, as much as she could, but Shiro could still tell he was missing pieces of himself with every fight, every kill. There was so much blood on his hands, so much suffering and death that he caused and it was getting harder and harder to sleep with that knowledge.

He shared dreams with Black as often as he could, reliving the beginning of Voltron, getting to know the old Paladins, the Zarkon that had been lost to time and greed. In return, Shiro showed her Earth, his family and childhood, his desire to see stars up close. She only laughed at the bright-eyed, younger him, pride pouring into Shiro’s being. Then, he showed Black the Garrison.

“That’s when my life changed,” he informed her, before showing her a scrawny, angry boy, with too long hair and sad eyes. “This is Keith, my best friend.”

“You love him,” came the response and Shiro only nodded, his heart warming significantly. He loved Keith with his whole being, therefore, Black loved him too.

“He’s the reason I need to go back to Earth,” he spoke quietly, making sure no guards heard him. They couldn’t understand him well, but he didn’t need to be punished for speaking of escaping. “I need to tell him that I’m alive, that I didn’t leave him like others had done.”

Yet, Shiro knew that he could talk about it as much as he could, but there was no way he could get out of there by himself. He was good, he was the best, but they outnumbered him by hundreds and he wanted to be alive once he arrived on Earth. Shiro was aware that Keith was the only thing that kept him going, him and Black, the knowledge that he was needed. They both needed him, just like he needed them and it was easier to fight when Shiro knew that he had two important beings, waiting for him. He was going to come for them.

Only he didn’t get the chance.

 

* * *

 

 

In the end, it had been Ulaz that found him. Strapped to the table and surrounded by Druids and robots, the gentle humming of machines a perfect background for the grunting and cries of pain. Shiro remembered how scary Ulaz had looked, another Galra bending over him, yet his hands had quickly untied him and pushed him towards the exit. It had taken Shiro a while to get his bearings, but once he did, he stopped the man, eyes wide.

“I need to get back to Earth,” he had spoken quietly but desperately, his whole body shaking. That had been his only chance and he had to get it.

But the Galra had only shaken his head and denied him that.

“It's too dangerous, you wouldn't survive,” he had said, voice devoid of any emotions. And Shiro had wanted to fight and scream and go anyway, but Black had chosen that mint to speak to him.

_Don't, my Paladin. I will not lose you yet. Dead people can't help._

That had been the thing that made Shiro go with the stranger, his heart heavy with regret but head light with freedom. If Black trusted this man, then everything hadn’t mattered for Shiro, not with how much of a mess his head had been. Still, he hadn’t been able to stop himself from longingly staring into space as they left in a little spaceship. He could remember that moment so clearly, standing in his torn and dirty clothes, shaking from adrenaline and pain, and staring into the endless space, knowing that somewhere there Keith was waiting for him. And Shiro had known that there would only be more distance between them.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading and if you still want more, please leave a comment or tell me what you liked or would like to see. means a lot
> 
> love <3


	3. Chapter 3

Shiro was focused as he piloted the small, fast ship away from the base, careful not to crash it on the natural barrier they had. Ulaz and Kolivan were sitting next to him, silent, all of them deep in their thoughts. Kolivan had been adamant about leaving with them, arguing that as the Leader, he had to be there, to meet their possible allies. Shiro only shrugged and stayed silent, too nervous and excited to even talk much. The journey would take some time, even with the jumps, but he was almost glad for it. On one side, Shiro couldn't wait to finally meet Black, see her in all of her glory, pilot her like she deserved to be piloted. On the other side, there were other Paladins.

Black had told him that all of the Lions with their Paladins were needed for her hangar to open. It was a safety pin, that ensured no one else would be able to get to her. That meant, that there was a team waiting for him, and from what he had seen in Black’s memory, they wouldn’t be a trained, accustomed to each other team. Shiro wasn’t sure if they would accept him, with his Glara arm and scars, PTSD and nightmares. He was dangerous and he knew that they would probably know who the Champion was. 

His mind was filled with doubts and fears and as always, Black came with her soothing rumble and quiet, but fierce presence.

_ Worry not, my Paladin. You were made to fit together. _

Shiro only huffed in the answer and tightened his hold on the controls. They may have been, but the universe rarely worked the way it was supposed to be, as he had learned. Everything could go wrong and he had been saddled with the responsibility of getting them to work well together. As the Black Paladin, it would be his team and his decisions in battle and while Black was sure he would make it work, Shiro couldn’t help but doubt himself. He was so glad to have Black there, support like nothing else, knowing his thoughts and desires, his darkness, and now shying away, but sharing her own. They completed each other. 

“Shiro,” Ulaz finally spoke and he glanced at the man, seeing his worried eyes. 

He had noticed some time ago, that Ulaz was the most expressive and accommodating of the Blades, willing to take his emotions and past into consideration. Not to say that Kolivan and others were cruel, but sometimes they refused to see that there was something other than the mission. That the missions were carried out by people, with feelings and fears and doubts. Shiro talked with Ulaz frequently, especially at the beginning when he had been trying to make sense of everything and he knew the man enough to notice that something was wrong.

“Yes?” he asked simply, eyes back on the window. 

“I hope you are aware that I am deeply sorry for not finding a way to sent a message to your family back on Earth.”

Shiro stayed silent for a while, trying to think of something to say. He used to be angry, so angry at the man for pulling him into this mess, further and further away from his home, his Keith. With time, he started to see the reason behind it and the anger slowly ebbed away. He still felt guilty and sad when thinking of Keith, all alone again, abandoned by yet another person, but he hoped there would come a time when he’d be able to fulfil his promise. 

“I know and I don’t blame you for it. You saved me, Ulaz,” he replied finally, voice softening a bit. That was something he had been very grateful for, getting him out of that hell. “I understand why you did what you did, I probably would’ve done the same in your place. But just like you miss Thace, I miss Keith and I will always miss him.”

Ulaz twitched at the mention of his mate, a Lieutenant in Zarkon’s command, a high-placed mole. They didn’t see each other much and while Ulaz knew it was for the best and that it was needed, he still missed him, just as Thace missed Ulaz in return. He could understand that much and suddenly, the longing glances that Shiro kept sending into the space made sense.

“You left your mate back on Earth,” he finally stated, ears twitching in understanding.

Shiro sent him a glance and frowned.

“He’s not my mate, he’s my best friend, but well… He may as well be,” he sighed finally.

His love for Keith was only getting more and more overwhelming, the more time and distance was between them. Shiro knew that the moment he came back to Earth, he would go, find Keith and confess his love. His heart couldn’t take that much pining. Black couldn’t take that much pining, though her annoyed complains were always fond and full of love. 

“I made Keith a promise, that I will keep coming back to him, and I intend to keep it. However long it takes.”

Kolivan and Ulaz grunted at that, understanding a vow that Shiro would never break and for a long moment, it was silent again. Shiro got lost in his own thoughts again, Black purring somewhere deep in his mind, making him smile and relax a bit. Her insistence that everything would be okay, that he would make it, made it so much easier to face everything. He wasn’t alone anymore and that was such a comfort in the vast emptiness of the universe.

He was on his way to finally see Black in all of her glory, finally physically sit on the pilot seat, get his hands on the controls. It was a big day, one that he had been waiting for years, but at the same time, there were so many other things screaming in his mind. Shiro’s biggest fear, aside from being a good leader, was explaining that the Blade of Marmora wasn’t actually their enemy. That just because he was wearing black and purple suit didn’t mean he wasn’t their ally.

 

There were so many challenged in front of him, close enough to actually touch and Shiro knew, that if it wasn’t for Black, he’d crumble and go back to Earth. While he had always been determined and driven, some things felt too big. Before the Kerberos mission, he had Keith, with his short temper and grumbled reassurances. Now he had Black and her unwavering faith.  And with her support, he had a chance of seeing Keith again, to apologize for being late… and maybe hug him again?

Shiro sighed when he realized that it's been years since he’d last felt a positive touch. The Blades weren’t exactly the affectionate type and the last hug he shared, was with Matt just before that terrible fight. Back on Earth, he had been a very touchy person, especially once he became comfortable with someone and his mind went back to his stargazing sessions with Keith, who would end up falling asleep on his shoulder. Memories like that kept Shiro fighting, even after escaping the arena.

He focused back on the space in front of him, as they started to enter more dangerous zones and let his hands move. It was an instinct to pilot a ship, after long hours upon hours in stimulations and then the Kerberos flight and Shiro could admit that he had missed it. Becoming a spaceship pilot had always been his dream and even though space had brought him misery, pain and PTSD, he still loved it. And it was easier to focus on piloting, than on whatever awaited them on that planet. 

 

* * *

  
  


When the planet finally came into view, Shiro had to remind himself how to breathe. Black’s rumbling was getting louder and louder, both of them excited to finally meet, but he was also worried. Anything could happen there and he desperately wanted to avoid any fighting, because it would create unneeded complications. His mind was a mess, more than usual, and even Kolivan sat up straighter. This was a big thing, a first time in years since the Blades met an ally that had this much potential. They were all a little stressed but determined and when the entered the atmosphere, Shiro sat up straighter.

The planet was a bit similar to Earth, only quite deserted and Shiro was reminded of the history of Altea. The Galra had killed everyone, in a desperate attempt to get to the Lions, but Shiro knew that someone had to be alive there. Something had to have happened, to create a signal strong enough to reach them. Black didn’t seem to be concerned, though Shiro was wondering if it was her lack of understanding that many emotions just yet or an instinct.

She had told him that her Pride was happy, that the new Paladins were perfect and different but they all fit together. That made him hope that everything would go more or less alright. There would be enough fighting to come, they didn't need to fight each other. 

He landed perfectly, the ship carefully touching the ground, and Shiro closed his eyes for a moment, once the engine was dead. Black purred with encouragement so he sighed and stood up, Ulaz and Kolivan already near the exit. The planet was warm and sunny, the weather very similar to the one on Earth and Shiro smiled at the resemblance. There were few things in the universe that brought back memories of home and he liked to cherish each one of them.

The castle was big and imposing, yet sleek and beautiful. Shiro could see that it had been built a long time ago because most of the architecture on active planets was vastly different, but it only added to the charm. Like those old castles back on Earth. The closer they got, the louder Black’s purring got, as she grew more and more impatient to truly awaken. Shiro only smirked and took off his hood and mask, knowing that two Galras wouldn’t make a good impression. 

They got as close as a hundred feet from the entrance, when a barrier closed behind them, leaving them basically defenseless against the giant castle, but Shiro remained calm. He hoped that whoever was inside wouldn’t shoot on sight, even when he was wearing a clearly Galran suit. He squared his shoulders and kept walking, stride sure and confident, not showing the war that was happening inside of him. This was the moment, the climax of his little journey and he was nervous like he had been before the Kerberos mission. But just like before, he stayed calm on the outside. 

He straightened his posture as Kolivan and Ulaz came to stand next to him, flanking both of his sides. They all stared at the castle, making no sudden movements, just staying still, until Shiro decided to speak up.

“We didn’t come here to fight.”

His voice carried over and he was sure that that could hear every word. Shiro made sure not to say “We come in peace” as there were too many terrible memories associated with that phrase. Galra hadn’t cared and he doubted that whoever was inside would care either. 

“We are not your enemies, unless you are allies of the Glara Empire. If not, we share the same goal.”

Kolivan and Ulaz stayed silent but tense, all of the expecting the worst, when finally there was a response from the Castle.

“How can we know we can trust you?” asked a pleasant, female voice. It was clear that the speaker was trying to sound more stern that she actually was, but Shiro understood that. 

“You can’t know that,” Shiro answered honestly. “We don’t know you and you don’t know us, but I can tell you, that Black is waiting for me, inside this Castle. And I am getting inside, to finally see her.”

For a moment, everything paused and they all prepared for a fight. Shiro hadn’t meant to actually tell them everything, but they were ridiculously outnumbered, practically helpless, and it was their best shot. Time was of the essence. 

“You speak of the Black Lion?” the woman asked again, and Shiro smiled under his mask, He could feel Black, she was inside, waiting for him, just like she had promised.

“Yes. She’s mine and I’m hers. I need to finally meet her in person.”

For some reason that was enough for the door to open. Surprised, Shiro glanced at his companions, but they just started walking, so he followed them. He wasn’t the leader here, never would be, but he was the one who had the best chance of getting them through this meeting.

They walked almost soundlessly, the corridors heart but empty, years and years of solitude evident in every corner. The Castle was beautiful, stunning almost, but it screamed of loneliness, an echo of its emptiness still evident in the walls. Shiro could relate.

Finally, they came to a door, which lead to some sort of a leading centre, maybe the bridge. Shiro took a deep breath, glanced at Kolivan and Ulaz and entered. His instinct was to search the whole room for possible escape and good places to fight, before he glanced at his new companions. There was a tall, beautiful woman, probably the one who had spoken to him a while ago. She was clearly a royalty, an Altean royalty, left alone with only one of her species. Another Althean, ginger and dressed in some sort of an uniform, staring at him with curiosity. 

Then, Shiro’s eyes slipped at the other members and his breath froze. They were...Human. There were two young men, one of them lanky and tall, the other bulky and big. Next to them was someone much shorter and it was easy to recognize that person, even with his time in captivity, his memories in scrambles. It was Katie, now with short hair and wearing an armour but undeniably Katie Holt, younger sister of his friend and family to the ones he had lost in space. Shiro stepped a bit closer, all of the tensing and it was only then that his eyes met familiar, purple ones.

“Keith,” slipped out of his mouth, a mere whisper yet loud as a scream in the silent room,

The Paladins all froze but Shiro had his eyes only for Keith, his beautiful, fierce, precious Keith suddenly in space, so far away from home. Shiro’s hands started to tremble when he reached up and deactivated his mask, the hood falling down. They all gasped, probably recognizing him from many Garrison posters and the later from the Kerberos mission, but once again Shrio didn’t care.

He couldn’t, not with Keith’s gorgeous eyes trained on him, full of hope and pain and disbeliever.

“Shiro…?” his best friend whispered, voice sounding so broken and vulnerable that Shiro wanted to hug him close and hold him together, so that nothing bad could happen to him. 

“I kept my promise,” Shiro said softly, a small smile smiling on his face as they walked closer to each other. “I came back to you.”

With that, they crashed. It was unavoidable, as if there was something always pulling them together, two stars caught in each other’s gravity, aware that they would meet sometime. It felt like that, when Keith’s arms closed behind his back, desperately clutching Shiro’s suit. He took  a deep, shaky breath and his his face in keiths silky hair, eyes slipping shut. In that short, fragile moment, Shiro felt as if everything had been worth it. This suffering, pain and blood on his hands, it had all been worth it if he got to hold Keith in his arms again, a Paladin of Voltron, fighting next to him yet again.

So unbelievably worth it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was hoping to put it up earlier but i had no internet sadly. if you enjoyed, please, leave a comment to let me know, they always make me smile.
> 
> love <3

**Author's Note:**

> let me know it of you liked it, and if i should post more! it was hard to write it, but i just had to, hope you enjoyed my efforts!
> 
> love <3


End file.
